By Jove...

[seawasp]

... I remember back in '67 I heard a noise outside our tent, and stepped out and shot a rhino in my pajamas. And how he got into my pajamas I will never know. Ha!


Apparently the most likely diagnosis for my problem is gout.

GOUT! That's a disease in Agatha Christie novels, for old former Colonial Indian Colonels surrounded by Benares Brass and eating curries cooked for them by their man that they brought with them from Delhi!

Blast it all, am I going to have to start growing those muttonchop whiskers?

Comments

[shana.livejournal.com]

Well, Rob's got the muttonchops. But I don't know if you could con him into taking the gout for you.

Have some curry, though.

[anghara.livejournal.com]

Oh, ABSOLUTELY! I'm sorry about the gout, by all accounts it's an extremely unpleasant thing to have, but those muttonchop whiskers are now a must...

[rezendi.livejournal.com]

Your diagnosis is, if nothing else, au fait.

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

False teeth, need bifocals. How many forty-somethings do you that meet that description, hm?

having teased about gout...

[the-blue-fenix.livejournal.com]

I feel bad now. But isn't it pretty treatable now, cutting the animal protein in your diet or some such?

Re: having teased about gout...

[murstein.livejournal.com]

More than just animal proteins, but yeah, managing one's diet can reduce it a lot. (I hit the research hard and heavy, between a misdiagnosis and the lab results.) Gout is basically a buildup of uric acid crystals, and the joint at the base of the big toe is the favorite spot for the crystals to build. (There are other diseases, wherein other things crystallize out of the blood stream, too; that spot is the favorite for all sorts of crystals to build. There's probably an explanation that involves fluid dynamics, that I never got to.)

The diet idea is to reduce intake of purines, which are present in foods besides meats. It's not a cure-all, because the body will still manufacture uric acid, even in the absence of dietary purines. But it does measurably reduce the presence of uric acid in the bloodstream.

In the week or so, between my gout misdiagnosis and learning it wasn't gout, I avoided the foods listed on this page. Other sites have other lists, but the only ones I ran across with significantly different lists appeared crackpot for other reasons as well.

[nuranar.livejournal.com]

Worst of all, you'll have to lay off the port!

Re: having teased about gout...

[seawasp]

"cutting the animal protein in your diet".

Tell that to a T-Rex.

[guy-jin.livejournal.com]

you and Ben Franklin now have one more thing in common.

[tekalynn.livejournal.com]

Ouch! My sympathies.

I actually do know a woman who has gout, and who is far from the stereotyped nineteenth century white rich boozing male.

[wyjoe.livejournal.com]

"I remember back in '67 I heard a noise outside our tent, and stepped out and shot a rhino in my pajamas. And how he got into my pajamas I will never know. Ha!"

You should have shot him in Alabama, where the Tuscaloosa.

All right, I'll leave quietly.

This won't help your gout, but it might make you feel a bit better...

[salkryn.livejournal.com]

Have you, perchance ever heard of Dragonball Z Abridged? I saw a couple episodes on Youtube and thought of you. It's a brilliant parody of DBZ, and they managed to keep pretty much every central plot point intact. As far as getting gout goes: ouch.

Re: having teased about gout...

[kayshapero]

Hey, at least chocolate's on the "gout friendly foods" page associated with that link.

Re: This won't help your gout, but it might make you feel a bit better...

[keithmm.livejournal.com]

Another rip-off of the utterly brilliant "Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged." Still amusing in its own right.

"Screw the rules, I have money!"